Hindsight is a wonderful thing and little did I know that one of my all time favourite songs is what I live by to cope and deal with miscarriage. Oasis, Don’t look back in anger. After the first and second I was just filled with anger and hate which isn’t a healthy state of mind to be in when grieving. I would be like why do they get to be parents when they don’t do anything for their kids or how people complain about their kids to you without realising what a privileged position they are in compared to you. When in fact during grieving it is fine to feel this but to counteract it with positives that are in your life rather than focus on the hate. Now we are at number 4 the frustration of not being listened too or given the care and treatments we need with the NHS rather than focus on this anger at there lack of care and support they promised. Deciding to go and see a specialist that listens to you and is now providing valuable tests and treatments with a clear action plan and dates gives you hope and something to focus on to keep aiming for your goal. I am sure one day we will turn this dream into reality but in the meantime I will focus on the great elements of my life and not look back in anger...